The jerk store called and wants you back. ~ George Costanza

I had a strange experience this week of talking to a guy who seemed like he was flirting with me and then he turned to “interrogate” me and made rude remarks like “well if you really have a degree in Psychology…” I was like, what? The switch over happened so suddenly that it took me by surprise. At first I felt tears of hot anger…but feeling on the defensive…and flipping back to someone who explains themselves in a moment when she should just tell someone to jump off a roof.

I regrouped quickly and did tell said person to jump off a roof and he was snotty about it (as if it was undeserved). Reeling backwards…I didn’t plan his advances, didn’t expect them and then it seemed like he went out of his way to be nasty right off the bat (like it wasn’t about me, it was about him and suspicions he harbors about all women).

It was odd.

And the weird thing was that when he first started talking to me he kind of reminded me of Michael and his initial interest in me (like it was very focused and he seemed to “get” the way Michael did how to let someone know how great he thought they were).

And I was thinking it was nice. But then he switched like someone turning into a werewolf in the full moon. Something, of course, Michael never did in 13 years that I knew him. He was kind and wonderful and funny and sweet as I’ve said on here a million times. Not just the day I met him, but the last time I spoke to him and every single day in between.

The oddness of this encounter brought hot anger at first and then hot grief. Red. hot. grief.

Part of me was feeling that I didn’t deserve a minute of that conversation, but I fell back into this acute grief where I just wish he was still here. Where I wish and wish and wish…. Nothing in this world brings home to me what a wonderful person he was than running across someone who is anything but…