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I try to not write about celebrities. I try to stay on this side of things. I’ve written (positively) about Jennifer Aniston and some things about Britney Spears’ meltdown a few years ago, but I try to stay out of that fray although I was asked about and quoted extensively about Ray J and Kim K (that article probably got more play than either Ray J or Kim and that’s going some) as well as Taylor Swift using a “breakup coach” (again widely quoted but originally sourced via the New York Post) but those journalists came to me for expert commentary, I did not go to them.

If you see ANY articles about Lea Michele and how she is “still grieving” and can’t get out of bed “although some time has passed” DON’T READ IT AND CLICK ON IT. Actually don’t read ANY articles about her unless they seem to understand and don’t say stupid things like “she is STILL a mess.” They are sensationalist garbage that have no compassion or empathy for her and most have NO CLUE about the grief process.
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Apparently Joyce Carol Oates’ book caused quite the brouhaha mostly because one reviewer noted that Ms. Oates remarried quite quickly after the death of her husband of 40 something years. Some readers accused Ms. Oates of manipulating them with her book and not really being about anything but herself. The book is almost devoid of who her husband was.

Okay. That is what it is. It may be an open question as to whether it was just a bloodletting that managed to get published only because it was Ms. Oates or because it’s a valuable book. But the book and the fallout, for better or worse, opened up a discussion about widowhood and grieving. The problem continues to be that people, most people, have no clue about grieving and too many profess to know. And they don’t.

Along comes Ruth Koningsberg with a new book boldly and brashly (and erroneously) titled, “The Truth About Grief” and an New York Times OpEd to add a lot of fuel to the fire.
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